“So when you are listening to somebody, completely, attentively, then you are listening not only to the words, but also to the feeling of what is being conveyed, to the whole of it, not part of it.”
– Jiddu Krishnamurti
You may be aware that I spent many years teaching hypnosis and hypnotic language. I don’t teach those skill-sets anymore, but recently someone asked me what my favourite hypnotic induction is. (In case you’re not familiar with the term, a hypnotic induction is a process for leading a person into an altered state.)
The answer I gave to this question was unexpected, counterintuitive and has profound implications if you want to have deeper connections, more influential communications and greater impact with clients, colleagues and loved ones.
The answer I gave to the question “What’s your favourite hypnotic induction?” was this: Listening. But not just any kind of listening. The kind of listening that leads to connection and impact is what I call “clarity listening”.
For many people, listening means waiting for their turn to speak
When was the last time someone really listened to you? People often have a lot on their mind, so while it may ‘look’ like they’re listening, they’re often…
– Thinking about something else entirely
– Trying to shoehorn what you’re saying into their view of the world
– Working on possible solutions to solve your problem or help you reach your goal
– Thinking about what they’re going to say next
The reality is that most people have forgotten how to listen deeply. It’s so long since they’ve listened (or been listened to) in this way, that they need to be reminded what it’s like.
Clarity listening equals a clear head and a sense of connection
Clarity listening is listening with nothing on your mind, sort of like you might listen to music, a radio play, or a piece of poetry. When you’re listening with clarity, you get involved in what the other person is saying, without having to fix, analyse or problem-solve. Listening in this way has a number of unexpected consequences…
Clarity listening benefits the person being listened to AND the listener…
For many people, their first experience of listening and being listened to in this way is on one of my training programmes. They often remark on just how good it feels to be really listened to. Here are some of the specific benefits of listening and being listened to in this way…
– You feel a sense of connection and rapport with the other person
– You get more into the present moment
– You point yourself towards the wellspring of fresh new thinking that’s there inside you
– You start uncovering solutions to problems and issues, having great ideas seeing next steps clearly
– You get more in touch with your wisdom and intuition, knowing the perfect thing to say or ask
– People often report feeling an increasing sense of peace and wellbeing
You’ll still be able to keep track of the conversation
One of the things that sometimes concerns people when they’re first learning to listen in this way is that they’ll lose track of the conversation, or won’t know what to say next. As you get the hang of clarity listening, you’ll find that you rarely lose track of the conversation. In fact, as you get a deeper understanding of clarity listening, you’ll find yourself being more in tune with the conversation, in a kind of ‘natural unfolding’ with the other person.
And why does this qualify as a ‘hypnotic induction’? Because clarity listening allows a person to start bypassing their superstitious thinking and get more deeply in touch with who they really are.
When you’re listening in this way, every meeting, conversation or coaching session contains the opportunity for deep connection and liberating insight. Don’t take my word for it – start experimenting and let me know how you get on by posting in the comments box below.
To your increasing clarity,
PLUS: Whenever you’re ready… here are 4 ways I can help you get the clarity and results that matter to you:
1. Hire me to speak at your event
If you want an entertaining and impactful keynote speech or breakout session for your conference, offsite or town hall meeting, email Nikki at firstname.lastname@example.org and type “Keynote” in the subject line.
2. Apply for the 2017 intake of the Certified Clarity Coach Training Programme
If you want to be part of the class of 2017, this year’s intake of the Certified Clarity Coach Training Programme starts in September. There’s an early booking price if you apply by this Friday, June 30th. You can find all the details and get your application in here: https://www.jamiesmart.com/clarity-coach-training-sh/
3. Join the Exponential Practice Professional Group
Join the Exponential Practice Professional Group and connect with the growing community of like-minded transformation professionals who are passionate about exponentially increasing their grounding, impact and their livelihood. You can join for free at www.JamieSmart.com/expo
4. Join the next intake of Project Glasswing
We’re putting together a new practice-building case study group at Coaching Package Power this month. Stay tuned for details… If you’d like to work with me and my team on growing your practice… email Nikki at email@example.com and type “Project Glasswing” in the subject line.
PLUS: check these out :
Get your free Exponential Practice Scorecard book www.JamieSmart.com/scorecar
Listen to the Results Mindset Podcast www.JamieSmart.com/resultspodcast
Listen to Your Exponential Practice Podcast www.JamieSmart.com/pod
Read the first 2 chapters of my Sunday Times Bestseller RESULTS: Think Less, Achieve More www.JamieSmart.com/instantresults